A COSMIC WEDDING
By Cyntha Gonzalez
Marriage is one audacious endeavour. We are enchanted by romantic fairy tale weddings, whether real or fictional. Kate Middleton and Prince William’s epic ceremony is still fresh in our memories. Often, we will travel to the ends of the earth to witness Shakti and Shiva unite and make promises to each other.
I’m writing this post from Goa, India, where I have just officiated a wedding for an Italian Shakti and an English Shiva, who poignantly committed to a conscious marriage in front of their cherished family and dear friends.
During the ceremony, I evoked two universal archetypes to support their quest to commit to and live a conscious marriage. Archetypes transcend identity and cultural influence. They are symbols that any human can relate to.
The first is Caduceus, an astrological symbol (also used to identify pharmacies the world over). We see a central staff surrounded by two ascending, spiralling serpents on each side, representing the feminine and masculine aspiring to the central winged circle, that flies above the mundane, to superior realms: the return to and mergence into the One.
The second symbol is the sacred geometry symbol of the triangle. It’s sacred because it has its base, representing the dense, earth realm, and the two lines meeting at the Apex, or central consciousness. It is a pictorial depiction of the esoteric slogan, “As Above, So Below,” where celestial, higher consciousness splits itself into yin and yang and infuses itself into the earthly dimension or our more base personality nature. The base also aspires, like our ascending feminine and masculine serpents, to merge and reunite with higher consciousness.
The American authors, Ondrea and Stephen Levine, elaborate on how the bride is at the left corner of the triangle while the groom is at the right corner. The lines that connect to the central Apex of the triangle are the spiritual practices or centering tools that take each individual to connect with their higher self, where ego is not in command.
These tools can be meditation, prayer or even dance, cooking or gardening; whatever takes the person to their wisest, connected self. The couple has a choice. Will they relate to each other at a more base level – where power struggles, ego games, inner child reactions and fear rule? Hopefully only temporarily so. Or will they make a commitment to connect to this higher perspective and relate to each other from a more mature, inspired position?
There is one serious catch. If one does their meditating and arrives at a higher knowing, this partner will need to risk sharing his or her truth with the other. Fear of rejection, chaos and the unknown come with such risky communication. The promise of the Apex of the Triangle is that the truth will somehow be in the other’s higher good, since both are connected to the same source. What is my truth is your truth. Or “I choose for you what you choose for you,” as the author of Conversations with God points out.
When our Italian and English couple decided to marry, they wanted to write their own vows, to support their particular shared life circumstances. For example, the bride vowed to commit to her groom’s four children with patience and generosity. He vowed to encourage his bride’s life calling as an altruistic artist. They also included vows that helped them with personality challenges, so they would be relating as conscious adults.
When our cosmic couple declared vows to the congregation, they held themselves accountable to their community, where the stakes are higher with such a vulnerable revealing. We, as their chosen witnesses, also have a responsibility to support them in maintaining those vows. This can be dicey territory – we don’t want to meddle but we also don’t want to ignore them when they may flail or get caught in the slipperiness of ego defenses.
In preparing for this wedding, I read Stephen and Robin Larsens’ account of an avatar couple of the mid-20th century. Joseph Campbell, the famous anthropologist-mythologist and Jean Erdman, a talented modern dance choreographer and theatre director had an evolved marriage. Each partner’s creativity was adhered to beyond the norm of their patriarchal peers.
Joseph was 13 years Jean’s senior and formerly her professor. He used this more fatherly influence in the beginning of their marriage to urge her to not expend her creative talent on shopping and cooking meals in the kitchen. Instead he suggested they dine out so she could then put all her energy into her true calling – being an artist in her studio. She went on to become one of the world’s most acclaimed modern dance choreographers.
The emotional and physical intimacy in such a marriage with these kinds of foundations has a better chance of being potent and deep, particularly if that Apex of the Triangle is worked on a regular basis. The reassurance needed to fully open, to surrender and to let go into the abyss of love takes the couple into an expanded safety. These dynamic partners are a shining light, proving that incarnated Shiva and Shakti role models do exist and regularly meet in that healing, restorative One.
Happy Marriage Shiva and Shakti!
Cyntha Gonzalez is a Transpersonal Psychology Counsellor, a Tantric Healer and Holotropic Breathwork facilitator.
For more information go to www.cynthagonzalez.com
