Andrea Anstiss, Psychotherapist & Hoffman Process Teacher explains how her upcoming workshops can help to transform you
How often do you embrace your inner child?
Well your inner child is a major aspect of you – it is your connection to your innocence, your freedom and your wonder about this magical universe that we live in. However, most of us are not aware of this child within although we are aware of feelings of emptiness, depression or addiction. Often we go into hiding very early through experiences such as being compared, judged, criticized, neglected or abandoned. That child may have only been allowed to express certain feelings and so authentic feelings of sadness and anger are then hidden. Children are sometimes made to adhere to family rules – either to be perfect, be quiet or pretend everything is fine – even when it’s not. We need to express sadness and anger to feel whole and to let go of the past. We need to name all our feelings so we can feel happier.
Why is it important to heal our inner child?
Traditional parenting styles such as ‘be seen but not heard’ means that even as an adult we may have trouble speaking up for ourselves, asserting our needs or our right to be here. And often unknowingly, our parents simply repeated behaviour they themselves experienced and so as a child we absorbed that. If we don’t heal our inner child we can become numb and depressed – out of disconnection with our heart and our own aliveness. We need to feel all our feelings – they all have a role in our bodies intricate chemistry – emotion which equals energy in motion. We need to become a loving parent and show kindness to our own inner child – especially to the parts that may have experienced trauma such as hearing our parents argue or surviving different types of abuse. In this region, hitting children is frequently used for discipline and this deeply disturbs a child’s sense of preciousness and self-worth.
How easy is it to shake off limiting thought patterns?
Sometimes we don’t need to do any shaking. Literally becoming aware of what happened starts to begin to dissolve old thought forms, memories and hurt. Believing it happened, breaking the silence and banishing the blame are the 3 B’s to help us move through blocks and trauma. Some patterns are more entrenched and to move them out of the body we need to do some more expressive work.
Tell us more about the Core Identity healing…
The true core identity of a human being is goodness, benevolence open heartedness, kindness and love. This core identity becomes shrouded with false identities – such as I am not good enough. I am useless or worthless. These beliefs occur when we are shamed by parents, teachers, siblings and society. We feel like a bad person. It is not the truth of who we are, yet due to a child’s egocentric nature she/he feels like things her/his fault. In this way we take on others shame. It creates an awful false identity and we can continue to sabotage our lives as adults as a result.
What techniques do you use in your Inner Child workshop?
Art therapy/ creative expression (you don’t need to be good at art), visualisation, meditation, movement and journalling. Most importantly a loving, holding confidential space that allows us to be seen and heard.
Why does guilt and shame hold us back so much?
Shame is the lowest vibration of all our emotions and creates ill health and a sense of never being okay, no matter how hard we try. And boy we do we try – often the biggest achievers, the most perfect looking women are sometimes the ones who carry the most shame. It leads to self destructive behaviour in an attempt to escape this feeling of shame. Guilt is a cousin of shame and together these unexplored feelings wreak havoc in our bodies and lives.
What can someone expect attending your two full day workshops?
Huge awareness around thinking/behavioural patterns that are standing in the way of you creating and living the life you want. Plus, tools for waking up to these patterns and transforming them. Learning to forgive not just your parents but also yourself for continuing to hurt yourself as an adult. Deep compassion for your struggle and affirmation of your beauty and imperfect perfection. These workshops deliver a fresh, profound sense of your worth.
For more information or to book contact Andrea (andrea.anstiss@gmail.com/050 856 6912) or Lisa (lisa@lisalawscoaching.com/055 771 2857)
