Spiritual teacher and Vedanta expert, SA Sreedharan, talks about the power of acceptance
It is the way of life that things do not always happen as we want them to. In fact most things most of the time, do not conform to our expectations. In spite of the differences between our mental makeup and prevailing circumstances, we have to learn to live in this world, be happy and continue to progress. An important quality in this direction is to develop the quality of acceptance of ourselves, and how we relate to people and the world around us. This helps to maintain peace of mind and provide clarity in handling life’s challenges.
Acceptance should not be understood as a passive resignation to the way things are. It is a proper recognition and clear understanding of things as they are, followed by a intelligent response to them. We must recognise and accept the various situations in our life. It is easy to accept the good things in life, but we find it difficult to accept what we don’t like. We try to shun them, withdraw or deny their existence. This surely does not help us to overcome the problem. Instead, it continues to haunt us.
Non acceptance is mental resistance to things around us. A lot of mental energy is spent in the denial of situations rather than in dealing with them. When resistance increases, our mental agitations also increase. Complaining, grumbling, irritability are all signs of non acceptance. Such people can turn hysterical or retreat into a shell.
We need to convert resistance into acceptance. Resistance creates stress while acceptance brings tranquillity. It helps us to mould and adapt ourselves. It improves our capacity to face challenges. In a storm it is the mighty trees which break and fall down while the tender and supple plants survive. The former resist the force while the latter know how the bow down in acceptance.
When a problem confronts us we must face it fully. Denying or resisting is not the solution. Hiding from the problem develops fear of the unknown. A known enemy is easier to tackle than an unknown one. So be clear in defining the problem. Even write it down legibly if necessary.
Having defined the problem, stay with the facts as they are for some time. Objectively observe the reality of the situation. Your mind may complain, revolt or criticise. Observe these mental activities and allow them to subside. Do not criticize or judge but stay with the facts of the situation. When resistance begins to give way, the mind slowly begins to gain acceptance. Your mind gains calmness and your intellect gains clarity. Your choices become wiser.
We must practise this approach with various situations in life. It may not be easy in the beginning to accept the more deep rooted problems. With consistent effort, the resistance of the mind reduces. You begin to accept people, yourself and the world. Acceptance helps us to adapt and avoids the build up of internal pressure. It keeps your mind peaceful and intellect readily available. A calm mind brings cheerfulness. A strong intellect brings clarity in thinking. Problems never cease to exist but acceptance provides the maturity to handle these challenges. The first step towards change is awareness. The second step is effort and the third is acceptance. The question is…are you truly willing to change?
For information on upcoming workshops or lectures, contact sree@vedantaworld.org
